PAINT WORKS

Toilets ...today...tomorrow

Toilets . would u believe that toilets were a big deal ,as far as human needs are concerned they are  …I don’t deny that  but we have been thru ages where we have  been comfortable behind  a convenient bush  as well .as some are even now  are in touch with the nature  in the most natural way  Let me not digress ……when your apartment is of a crore  then the toilets do gain a lot of significance …folks I am speaking from an interior designers  point of view .Now this pent house  has 6 six toilets …sorry seven….including the powder room . after much thought ,deliberation and umpteen meetings the owners came to an  amicable decision to have the toilets in marbles .No not the Rajasthani ones ,,,,they are for neo rich desis …the old money ed class go for the Italian marble ,with gold ,copper or silver inlays. And so there I was designing the toilets with a colleague of mine .we designed the flooring and the walls with  dark Prado ,Italian beige with copper palladio tiles . the cost was balanced by the owner and our TL  who with the patience of a saint redid the designs as and when the choice of the marbles changed….t the tiles selected had names like passion ,energy  ,elegance and electricity ……we laid them to match the personalities of the house hold. The old owners had’ passion’ where as their young sons got ‘electricity ‘and ‘strength’ .the daughters had ‘purity’ and ‘elegance’the powder room … the ultimate status symbol was done in white marble with gold inlay worked tiles  and also sported an MF Hussain (he would nt be turning in his grave as he would have got a couple of crores for it .Two toilets were designed for the  yet to be born grand children of thie yet to be married sons  ( shows how  futuristically thought ful people are ) the the accessories were  of a lakh each …..boy! may they never have diarrhea ……Each toilet sported a skylight ….. with a view of the blue sky above .well ……all said and done there was the landscaping to be done and finally that too was over  and the final result each  commode was placed  amidst bushy plants .and each toilet sported pebbled pathway to the commode  and turfy grass in bits and pieces all around . ….so ….they u are!  even today man is most comfortable behind a convenient bush  ……only this is  his  personal bush ….

the sky light saga

Who doesn’t love a skylight .well, almost all except me .The  concept is fine with me  but not the construction of it .This dude’s villa had not one  which is normal …but  four...rather abnormal isn’t it .My question is ….if he wanted a piece of sky all the time why doesn’t he live in a b….d tent  or a roadside pipe .why in  a two crore villa  open to the skies .

As per my TL the creative head of the team …we were constructing it to give  it a unique look (the sky light I mean …and for gods sakes…how unique can u make a skylight of a toilet look ? ….The question was rhetorical .The expression of my TL  s  face told it all ..Madam , he said in his ponderous way …there are many ways to do it …check the net and you’ll see. The sigh that followed his speech gave the impression of a person forced to explain the theory of relativity to a mentally retarded person. Ignorance being bliss …I dutifully ignored it , acting dumb  is a trick I ve adapted years back ….Pretty useful in times like these……Pulling a paper  he started sketching …… a design of the grill  for the b….d  sky lights .It was ornate and   intricate . He so liked to sketch these  intricate designs and then shove it on us to make it concrete …..u know what I mean ..Now my question for the day is …umpteen number of grill workers and umpteen number of designs  floating around .One look at the sky light …..they would  get the whole thing executed in a jiffy  ….plain simple uncomplicated common  sense ..folks …..well that would leave us interior designers jobless …(..hmmmmm… food for thought .)..The design was drawn ,measured, scaled ,caddied and printed  and now for fitting them into slots…The openings left for sky lights .Each trial made us trim the design ..a little here and a little there  till it lost some of its intricacy and resembled an upright roach . Viewing our handiwork  the question flew out of my mouth  before I cud stop it “Are these to be  seen  from a helicopter”.(I just could not visualize people walking in and looking up to admire the sky light design  unless there was  an arrow pointing upwards  in all the 3 toilets and the foyer inviting them to to do so ….hence the question .My TL sported  a pained expression of a person  tried beyond his endurance and was speechless for once……

The Architrave and I

"Hmmm ....so ...hmmmm...OK now ," his tone thoughtful and contemplating .He drew a couple of lines on the already scribbled plane and looked up ."That will be an architrave of 18 mm thickness."and there I was beside him ...trying to look reasonably intelligent nodding wisely peering at the paper which sported lines and squiggles which to me resembled hieroglyphics. An Architrave ...Oh alright (Gosh was that English, Greek or latin ?) Help .Google !.

And then the trail of the Architrave began ....Google said it was a frame for the door ( Was that it? ..Did it have to be called an architrave ?Couldn't it have been called a frame in simple English .Well....work was work and architrave it had to be . I drafted the architrave as I thought it should be .He (my team leader ) goggled at the drawing and was silent for a couple of suspense filled moments. Then in an almost mournful tone he drawled (if you could drawl in a mournful tone ...),"Madam,How do you plan to fix this on the wall ? Where are the working details ?,I need a working drawing Madam ."

(Fix it ? wasn’t that the carpenters job?Iwas told that all an interior designer had to do was visualise the designs and feel smug .The nitty gritty of bolting and riveting was for the mortals who called themselves carpenters and fabricators .Hmmmm...Guess i was wrong)

With a sigh he picked up a sheet and drew some lines across and some parallel and marked out some dimensions.With a pencil he pointed to the lines and said in a resigned voice ,"See this is the wall and this line here is the plaster line ,then you have the frame work and then the architrave ."

(For the life of me I could n't relate it to any thing that resembled the picture of an architrave shown in the search engine .Well, never one to give up ..I faithfully copied the lines on to the screen and gave it some final touches of some extra lines and took a print out .

His reaction was almost painful to watch,"Madam ...he sounded as if in some agony ...where are the spacers ,why havent you shown the 12mm ply backing and what is the thickness of the veneer and what is the veneer that you are proposing to use "

Spacers?,veneer?ply backing ?..wasnt it supposed to be just an architrave ?Well deciding to take the bull by its horns ...I expressed my ignorance on constructing an Architrave..... and it started all over again

This time I knew i had got it right .(It was my seventh attempt ...).With a sigh of an achievement I pushed the printed sheeted towards him .An expression of pure agony crossed his face ...,."Madam ...how can you see the architrave when i am cutting a section in the wall like this ."

I saw my career as an interior designer crumbling like the wall he had just cut . I wanted to shout ",Who would cut a wall of his own house to check how it was made ?"

And this was just a beginning ,....suffice to say that I conquered the architrave in my 12 th attempt .and now...... its an ss finished Handrail of 50 mm dia fixed to ss uprights with 10mm glass.

Feline attraction

She fixed her feline gaze on him and softly purred …"whisker" …her tones seductive. She watched his whiskers twitch…. in fascination …his muscles rippling under the pelt of brown hair .Her own muscles twitched in response .She threw bac k her hair in readiness .her medium length of black fur swung back …ready to act .She advanced slowly so as not to scare him .He turned as if sensing her presence and fixed her with an unnerving stare and then looked around for an escape …..but by the time he spied an outlet he felt her claws run on his arm in a light caress……sending shivers down his spine .He arched his back and twisted away from her and then leapt down lightly to the ground and then broke into a run to scale the nearest wall .he could sense rather than hear her anger .He heard her bounding after him in an attempt to stop him .But his training in life now stood in good stead .Even as she reached the bottom step he was over the wall .He could hear her plaintive call, “Whisker come back here right now …or else I’ ll shut this door and never let you in” .

“Hah ..big deal”, ….he grinned as he rubbed himself against the post eyeing the new chick perched on the wall next door …….

“lady you don’t have a whiskers chance of catching me ….thank meaow.”

sunshine and blue mist

viva la viva( as in viva voce )

Hey .....i am back ..no- not with a bang, more with a whimper ...tired and feeling low (not my usual peppy self )and why ? all because of a VIVA ,yeah guys you read it right and no ,i was not the one conducting it I was at the receiving end ...please save your pity for some one else .I asked for this .Natural isn't it ... a student has to be tested ....and this was the first VIVA of my life and i wanted to make the most of it. Let me get to the details before you all blink in confusion.
Here I am a student of interior designing and after spending 5 months of drafting sheets and sheets of plans and elevation and sketching objects and figures and giving umpteen presentations on glass,wood and textures ,twisting myself out of shape trying to discern the different colours and their characteristics ....there had to be a test.....and there it was ,the writing on the board(sorry... wall ) ....a viva to test your knowledge .The news sent shivers down our backs .I was not in this alone, there were seven others ....who experienced the same shivers .and worst of all we had to redesign our folders to look like (like ......what ???ahem left to our imagination .?well ..not exactly ...it had to represent the subject of our studies ...interior ,designing and architecture
The further few days proved how secretive human beings can be .Each of us went about acting as though we were just going to cover our folders with a local news paper as we had no ideas (and we called ourselves creative !!!)My idea was to buy a suitcase and roll it in with my portfolio inside and I let every one know that ... but my mind was working on an overdrive for an idea which was easy to do but simple and attractive and of course ....cheap as my funds were low. Till the last moment the secrecy and pretension continued and the day came and each of us walked in with our portfolios ....guess none of us were really surprised ....cause everyone had worked hard at it .There was a model of a three storey building which housed the folder and a kitchen with complete utensils and chimney ,a room with velvet curtains another one with satin curtains and so on and so forth .and of course there was mine .a paper collage affair .....simple in comparison of course but conveyed the idea...so i thought.And slowly the cats crawled out of the bag .....on how long it took them ,how difficult it was and so on .....well that was about the folder .and now about the viva
As i was the seventh one (lucky for some )i cooled my heels refreshing my memory on things i had learnt so far. Any one looking into the room where we were parked would think that we were or some of us at least were getting ready for a bout in the ring.A couple of us were doing the calisthenics ,(to jog the fickle memory, of course ) the dancers were taking deep breaths as taught in their dance classes and another had her eyes closed and was in deep communication with the maker .The game began ....
Each candidate was questioned minutely as he or she came out after their stint with the interrogators ... to get a hint of what was going on ...but the feedback was not very encouraging ....they all had the same answer ....nothing was asked ...i wondered if we were living in the silent era .the external was a architect .....was he ahem! ....challenged in some way or better still struck dumb by our talent and knowledge???? The latter thought was the better option . Then , my number was called...I walked in with a feeling akin to that of walking into the proverbial lions den (there were two in there )
"Introduce yourself please"
"Ahem" (i unglued my vocal cords....it had got stuck when the sixth one had gone in )"my name is......."i began and as a after thought added my age as i ended my intro
(did i detect a surprise???)
"oh okay ...but we do have to question you , you know ".
"sure ..go ahead "(Okay ,so i lost the first round )
And then the scrutiny began My sketch book with my juvenile sketches was commented upon and duly appreciated which almost embarrassed me .The examiner even alluded to MF Hussain ( i was not quite sure if it was complimentary )and then my portfolio ...oh well that did me in .He took pains to point out the bloopers in my drafts.....okay..so they were repairable and as for the questions ....they were actually subject related, which indirectly summed up to a politely worded concerned enquiry as to whether i knew what i was doing there at this age .
and so ended the viva .We parted on a happy note ( so i d like to believe )
The result is not out (thank god for small mercies at least my weekend was saved ! )